Where the summer is killed by fall
Alive behind the Crimson Door, while the winter sing~

Brasil. Jan-07. Female. Single. Weird. Likes lots of stuff.

BEIJO PRA QUEM É TRAVESTI E ABRAÇO PRAZAMIGA.

Chumhandle: crimsonGatekeeper

I'M A FUCKING NACHO -WAIT

(七蝶)

melkior:

send hELP

Posted 11 minutes ago with 97,685 notes - reblog this

jack-of-none:

shitfacedanon:

dat-soldier:

sonnetscrewdriver:

dat-soldier:

did-you-kno:

Source

back the fuck up

There’s another story that I like about a Chinese general who had to defend a city with only a handful of soldiers from a huge enemy horde that was in all likelihood going to steamroll the place flat within hours of showing up.

So when said horde did arrive, they saw the general sitting outside the city’s open gates, drinking tea. The horde sent a couple of emissaries over to see what was what, and the general greeted them cheerfully and invited them all to come and take tea with him.

The horde decided that this was a scenario that had “MASSIVE FUCKING TRAP” written all over it in beautiful calligraphy and promptly fucked off.

Whoever that general was, he was clearly the Ancient Chinese equivalent of Sam Vimes.

did he just invite us over for tea nah man i’m out

This just keeps getting better

ugh guys

That was Zhuge Liang and it wasn’t tea, he sat down and played a chill song on his guqin. Zhuge Liang had such a reputation as calculating mastermind that his opponent assumed he had an ambush prepared and fucked off.

It’s thought to be a fictional incident but the “empty fort strategy” does appear in the Thirty-Six Strategems, which is attributed to Zhuge Liang (who was a real person), so yeah.

Other things Zhuge Liang was notable for include insulting his enemies with burns so sick that they literally died. (He did this more than once)

Life Goals: Zhuge Liang

Posted 40 minutes ago with 122,460 notes - reblog this

rebornica:

sweetmetaphors:

This is…*puts on sunglasses*

BALLIN’

10 EXTRA HOURS IN THE OMEGA BALLPIT

Posted 1 hour ago with 82,894 notes - reblog this
Posted 1 hour ago with 5,360 notes - reblog this

sagihairius:

cosplaying

pros: cons

cons: pros

Posted 2 hours ago with 36,551 notes - reblog this

caelas:

saying feminism is unnecessary because you don’t feel oppressed is like saying fire extinguishers are unnecessary because your house isn’t on fire

Posted 2 hours ago with 97,225 notes - reblog this

circumcisions:

circumcisions:

sluttyoliveoil:

hey someone told me you remind them of an owl

who

FUCK

Posted 3 hours ago with 252,987 notes - reblog this
As a random thought…

morenavbby:

So in the comics Hawkeye has 80% hearing loss.

The Black Widow is Russian.

Can you imagine when they’re on a mission and something goes wrong; the police are about to arrest them and they fall back on Plan H.

Black Widow, “So remember, you’re deaf and I don’t speak English”

Posted 3 hours ago with 39,047 notes - reblog this

simplypotterheads:

I like how all of these 11-17 year olds are just going to school with vampires and werewolves and giant spiders and vicious three-headed dogs in their backyard, yet they need a permission slip with an iron-clad parent/guardian signature to go have a harmless butterbeer at the nearby wizarding village. 

Okay, Hogwarts. Okay.

Posted 4 hours ago with 48,274 notes - reblog this
Finding Nemo…. Anime.

pandamelium:

You have no idea

image

how much I want this

image

Posted 4 hours ago with 157,376 notes - reblog this